Computer Update? Or CRAZED CONSPIRACY?

Photo by KOBU Agency on Unsplash

In the modern day and age, it's unavoidable.  Every time you turn on you computer, it's there. The dreaded "Update System" message. Not only do workers lose countless hours of productivity waiting for the Operating System to install the latest bug fix or virus software, we have to contend with the ever growing dread. 

"Will this update be enough?"

"How long until the next update?"

"Am I going to have to do an update tomorrow, too?"

Questions like these bog down the minds of our office workers and IT professionals around the globe. Stressor on top of stressor slapped on top of the scale of the mind, wearing down the humble employee. Is it any wonder that this journalist questions the necessity of the dreaded System Update? It makes one wonder if there couldn't be more diabolical reasons for the unending updates.

Are we truly updating important security features to our computers? Or is there nothing actually happening? This reporter has a theory.

Update after update is put off as long as possible, so that the humble worker might continue to work and be productive. But the frightful System Update continues to loom. What if these updates are not, in fact, necessary at all for security and productivity? 

This reporter stipulates that System Updates are nothing more than a CLEVER RUSE by the crafty ILLUMINATI to wear down our working class. We already know that Bill Gates is Illuminati. CLEARLY, THEY ARE IN CAHOOTS. 

BEWARE, AMERICA! THE ILLUMINATI HAVE INFILTRATED YOUR COMPUTER AND ARE SLOWLY UNRAVELING YOUR MIND.