A Simple Potion Recipe

Photo by Matt Briney on Unsplash

This is an old recipe my nana taught me that utilizes ingredients already lying around your cottage and one or two items you can easily acquire at your local fae night market. It does need to be a full moon outside, but you can start brewing as soon as it gets dark, you don’t need to wait until midnight. Any hour is the witching hour when you’re a witch doing witchy things.

1. Prep: You’re going to need several blessed vessels to contain the finished potion. If you don’t have time to wait for the jar fairy to leave a fresh batch at your door before the next full moon you can empty some pre-blessed jars you’ve previously used and skip to step 2. Take your fresh jars outside and set them upright in a sunny spot and leave them be until a curious cat comes and knocks one or more of them over. Your jars are now blessed, free of any negative energies that might taint their contents.
2. Place your cauldron over a medium flame and fill with fresh swamp water. Those not fortunate enough to live in a swamp can use box mix for similar results. While the water heats up, think about what a strong independent woman you are. Feel empowered.
3. Now you need to burn some dried herbs from your yard and deeply inhale the smoke to attune yourself to the local nature spirits. If you can hear distant singing or chanting it is working. There are slight regional variations, completely normal. Unless you hear drums growing closer and closer, then you need to cease all rituals and pretend not to be home. This is the nature spirits warning you of unwanted visitors that will disrupt the positive energy you're creating such as an angry mob of villagers, salesmen, missionaries, or your ex begging you to take him back.
4. You are going to need a fresh newt for this next part. The whole newt, not just the eyes. Nana didn’t do anything half-way and neither will we. Scavenge one outside or acquire one from your dealer. You can grind it up with a mortar and pestle if you’re feeling extra, otherwise put it into your food processor like a proper modern witch and turn it into a fine red mist before adding it to your cauldron. Remind yourself that you embody a vengeful goddess all men should fear. Revel in that power for a moment.
5. Now you need a few tablespoons of the freshest orphan tears you can get your hands on. Like parents’-bodies-still-warm fresh. Scour the local obituaries and get in there like Batman to opportunistically take advantage of that child’s new trauma. If you don’t have any recent family tragedies in your town’s newspaper but you still have living parents, you can always roll up your sleeves and prove your mom wrong when she said, “Orphan tears don’t make themselves.”
6. Next we need a few drops of virgin blood and the blood of a virgin. If you find someone capable of donating both you lock that rare unicorn in your basement and save them for a better ritual than this. Blood goes in the cauldron. Wave your most impressive knife over the simmering concoction and cackle menacingly. You have been practicing your menacing cackle, right? Let loose and enjoy the freedom of a good cackle. Throw your whole body into it.
7. Drink an entire bottle of wine.
8. Start adding whatever mushrooms you have in your pantry. Any kind, it really doesn’t matter. When they float to the top you’ll know you added enough. Wait for them to completely dissolve. The color of the liquid should change slightly and have a faint glow. Absorb the pale light as you prepare to purge the darkness within. Rethink your taste in wine.
9. Go outside and scream at the moon until you feel better.
10. Commune with the spirits in and around your home to locate the best spiders hiding in the darkest corners. You’ll need a good handful of shiny new spiderwebs, dusty cobwebs will not do. Add it to the boiling pot. It should be boiling by now. Did you forget to turn the heat up? Question your life choices while you wait for it to start boiling. Add the spiderwebs while trying to maintain dignity. Try not to cry. Cry a lot. Keep your tears of shame out of the cauldron or you’ll spoil the flavor profile.
11. Add a cup and a half of wild honey. Stir until fully incorporated. Remove from heat and portion into blessed jars and seal with your true name. Bury the jars under the oldest tree in your garden deep enough that the warmth of the sun cannot reach them and allow to ferment for 6 years. Serve over ice with a pinch of cinnamon.

And that’s it. A simple and refreshing potion recipe your entire coven will appreciate.